A note from the author: was going thru some old photos on FLickr and saw some really bad vintage Jen and was reminded on this entry, which was posted 2 years ago (almost to the day). Felt it was deserving of a re-post. Enjoy the hideousness.
At my little Floridian friend Hill's request (edited to add: or so I thought. I did see SOMETHING today on her site asking, but apparently I have either lost my mind or she deleted it), some photos evidencing vintage offensive gear/hair. (what the hell, even if she didn't, I'll post them anyway)
Okay, all 3 of these were taken post-high school.
Apparently, in the early 90's, I suffered from Reverse Fashion Dysmorphic Disorder (or RFDD). How else could one explain why I thought a tartan plaid shirt buttoned all the way up (who did I think I was, Color Me Badd?) with a black skirt, black tights, and flats looked hot?
Winter, 1991. Don't even get me going on my hair. And you have NO idea how long that took me. My hair is VERY straight and let's just say, I'm sure if I did that everyday, I'd have carpal tunnel. Oh, and even though I am 18 here, I was off to a bar with my friend Tonya - in the freaking boonies (not on campus) of CT. This was due to the fact that I would get laughed at by the bouncers when I would try places were all the other kids went, I looked THAT young. Therefore, when you go to some hick bar, you are hit on by guys who are barely educated beyond 11Th grade and think it's hot when you chip a tooth on your beer bottle (you think I make this shit up, but I can show you the tooth if you ask me sometime). Also, when you come home for the dentist appt. to get it fixed, you will lie your face off to your mom and say it was chipped on a soda bottle.
Next up, this pic was taken Spring 1992 with my college best friend, Tonya. We are at her boyfriend's off campus apt./house. I don't know why, but I liked this shirt a lot and it was in heavy rotation that spring/summer (now that I think of it, despite the pinkness, I think that shirt may have even been from the guys' dept.). You can't see it really, but it has a mock turtleneck-neck. Luckily, one day I woke up with a slap to the face and realized I hated it.
What you can't really see is that I am wearing loose, rolled up shorts. Those, too, were put into heavy rotation. Wearing loose, baggy clothing was very big with me back then. Also documented in this pic is my hair at longest it ever was. I wish I hadn't flipped it behind my back like I did. I'm really curious to see how long I'd gotten it. I can say with about 99% conviction that am also wearing white canvas Tretorns.
In this next picture this is...1994, 1995? In this picture, I am with one of my dearest friends, Helen. I will tell you, it does not help your ego one bit as you're documenting your shameful ugliness (bonus, I have Braces Round 2 here) when your friend is also a part-time model (she did Nine West shows in NYC.)
Here, we're at her house and getting ready to go out. By the way, that is not a shirt I am wearing but rather the very hot, must-have item, The SKORT. I LOVE how I have paired it (yet again) with black tights and black flats. The Flats, upon closer inspection, you will find bear a striking resemblance to PILGRIM SHOES. Also, the shirt I'm wearing is something I "borrowed" from my friend Amy. It is a grey-purplely color that was, not velor but really soft material, so it kinda had a velor shimmer to it. It made me look linebacker-ish, I think (tho again, does not help that I am being featured with a petite, hot Asian chick. bitch). I am also in the process of growing out a bad haircut, so you're gonna have to cut me some slack on that one.
Anyway, as you can see for yourselves, RFDD is a terrible, terrible thing to live with. Though, even upon review so many years later and all the wincing that has gone on this evening, it's nice to know at least I was having a good time in spite of it.