The other day I came home and Mike asked the standard, "and how was your day, Dear?" and rather than answering with my usual "fine/it was hell/rub my feet" reply, I actually told him in a little more detail.
"well, Mike...it's funny you should ask ...my day was fine until it ended with the two Dans asking me to referree a bet of theirs...."
The bet in question was how fast a 2005 Dodge Neon could go zero to sixty. Oh, how I wish I was making this shit up. A Dodge. Neon. Apparently Dan #1 had rented one in Texas and said 9 seconds or better. Dan #2 said 10+ seconds.
OH. My. God. I am trapped in NERDVILLE: Population 2.
Both gave "compelling" arguments supporting their respective cases including website info and a Car & Driver-like rag to serve as documentation. However, seeing as I really don't care how fast a car goes 0-60...let alone a DODGE NEON, I will not say who I gave the win to, but I will say THEY REALLY DON'T PAY ME ENOUGH TO DEAL WITH THIS KIND OF NONSENSE.
While I'm at it, these were the same 2 that took a soy milk break the other day.
There, ...now I feel better.
Um, why tell the story and then NOT TELL US WHO WON??!!
Rage.
Posted by: Tim | April 21, 2005 at 08:58 AM
Based on a few websites (incl Dodge's - so much for being partial)The 2005 Dodge Neon can do better than 9.
Consumer reports had 10.something but that was for the 2003 model, so I had to give it to Dan #1.
Dan #2 even as I am typing this says the bet was "inconclusive".
Posted by: Once More | April 21, 2005 at 10:26 AM
BTW - thanks Tim....because now that I have put this in writing, I have hurt Dan #2's feeling and Dan #1 is having a field day. And I have to work w/ these 2...
Hope you are happy.
Posted by: Once More | April 21, 2005 at 05:19 PM
Yep, I'm feeling pretty darned good about the whole thing.
Posted by: Tim | April 22, 2005 at 09:10 AM
I don't like your postings or epically any references about me. I am going to have my rival site set up. TWICE MORE WITH AGGRAVATION
Posted by: Dan | April 22, 2005 at 04:42 PM
1. what is "epically" - is that the cruel, medieval torture device from the 90s that painfully removed hair from women's legs?
2. I loved how you stopped by my desk, "yeah, I just posted on your website ....BYE!".
so brave, young grasshopper, so brave.
3. I am immune to your insults due to your insistence on wearing pleated pants.
Posted by: Once More | April 22, 2005 at 05:27 PM
p.s. - and didn't give you the f'n win? GEEZ.
Posted by: Once More | April 22, 2005 at 05:28 PM
epi·cal·ly adv.
Surpassing the usual or ordinary, particularly in scope or size: “A vast musical panorama... it requires an epic musical understanding to do it justice” (Tim Page).
Heroic and impressive in quality: “Here in the courtroom... there was more of that epic atmosphere, the extra amperage of a special moment” (Scott Turow).
Posted by: Dan | April 25, 2005 at 09:17 AM